long awaited video

LONG AWAITED VIDEO!!!

Okay attachment are finally over YIPPIE!!! i really need this holiday to recharge again coz i've been sick for a month already. I need all the slp i can haf to recover or else arh i might think that i got chest infection or some other kinds of disease. Been taking care of ppl with chest infection so i'm kinda worry coz i've been coughing for too long liao though its getting better each day. However my flu haiz really haf to pop the cold panadol to eat liao. I need to get well so can go out play and shop and shop more haha!!!

okay here is the long awaited video i took when i went out wif zq they all to sing K. its kinda funny lah haha. i took my tired legs than bengi singing and in the background there was 2 hungry ghost (zq and tsl)eating and eating and eating haha!!!!!! Well it was a fun day with zq acting crazy at times esp when she is singing.Its bloody funni lor. Actually its gd to go sing K in a big grp but must be with ppl u like or enjoy their company or else it will be a drag .................

Okay pls kindly play very and i do mean very patiently ( i tink not correct spelling rite??) watever lah for the video to load. i think the last video i upload doesn't seem to load. guess my layout too small for my video haha!!!! anyway i'm trying to do something bout it when i feel like it so bare with it at the moment haha!!!!!

results

RESULTS OUT!!!!

Recently i realize i like to type KAOZ in tagboards or in blogs or watever hahaha!!!! anyway results are out for my sem 2. In the nite i could not slp well at all. though i was not thinking bout the results but i guess sub consciously i am bah. i think.......... Well other stuffs were on my mind too actually. Well enough of all those i cannot slp rubbish.

In a few hours time haf to get out of bed to go attachment liao but here i am blogging. well just feel like blogging. JUst came to realize that blogging is quite a good way to release ur worries and feelings and other stuff watsoever.

think haf to slp now liao or at least try or just lie dead on bed to rest and pyscho myself to sleep.

P.S ZQ i friday can go play fireworks with you liao if i not going to sing K with my frens. Will sms u tomolo or friday morning /afternoon to confirm yah!!!! or wanna go sing K on friday also can haha but call tsl too bah. Anyway juz can't wait for the end of my attachment!!!!! YIPPIE!!!!!!!!!!!! FREEDOM FOR 1 WHOLE MONTH!!!!!

surprising day

Surprising Day!!!

Today is like a day full of surprises lor. Going to this Jeremy party can be a gd thing too coz get to realize so many things that was hidden from me. Honestly I'm rather disappointed lor ( if u reading this u should know who u are). Never expect u will turn out this way. If u really need to vent somewhere call me lah. i can finds ways to help though i might not be very gd at it or u may not like it but i rather you come find me than to do those stuff. Becareful i come nagging at you and its going to be very unpleasent hor!!! ZI YE BING you noe!!!!!! Things i said at the party may not be nice lah buts its for your own gd and gd advice never sound nice rite??? Just remb wat i said lah and try hard ok. Nothing is that bad as long as its not the end of the world. Even if its the end of the world u still haf to take it to ur stride ( dunno how to spell lah). U know how to say to advice other ppl so i hope u can also listen to your own advice that you gif other ppl. okie??? pls promise me that you would stop doing wat you do. As a fren i dun wanna see you like that ok. I really want you well thats why all these nagging. dun try to avoid me or else HEHEHEHE!!!!!!!!

Anyway to EVERYONE OF YOU GUYS READING THIS............ whether isit family, personal, relationship problem you can look for me and i will be there to help you. Even if i cannot help i will still try ok. BTW i very resouceful hor. BUT if you kill or rob the bank or do illegal stuff hor dun look for me coz i will just call the police to arrest you lor.I dun wanna see anyone of you guys to do silly things. Its bcoz i treat you guys as gd frens than i nag or else i can't even be bother wif you. Die already i also wun care at all. I will just watch you rot away ur life and see you kill urself.

Ok enough of it liao or else too nagging. Anyway just came back bout an hour ago only. WAH this time my first time go home so late. break record liao lah!! Had a nice chat with Joson, Shermeen and Bengi!!! Many things was said and stuff but really glad we all chat tonite till in the wee hours........... Next time must have chatting session again mayb else where this time round.

Blog the next time round after my attachment and will upload the video of bengi that time singing K on wednesday... TATA

exams are over.....

EXAMS ARE OVER BUT.......


but the awaitment for the result sucks. i hope tis time can at least all get a C+ and above. Really no confidence at all. SAQ no problem at all but the MCQs ......... I'm so dead!!!!! This time round not enough time to study at all coz of the 3 weeks attachment i have b4 the exams. Too tired to study even if i wanted to. all my modules which would take me bout 3-4 days sometimes 5 days( okay i know i'm a slow learner) depending on my laziness to study are all studied in 1-2 days each. I really crash study till i fell sick and even had headaches and even felt like vomitting. Okay vomitting was only for bioscience. NOthing was going into my brains at all. It was really a horrible feeling.

Okay enough of disgusting stuff. Well today receive an e-mail from jeremy zhan bout his 21st birthday party. Dunno wanna go anot coz i saw the e-mail list and is like i dunno anyone there and i dun really like this kind of party stuff. Mayb i do like such parties but its the ppl haha.... haiz.... his bday coming which also means my bdae is coming too haha. so fast but this time can only really celebrate if i pass my exam without having to retake. haiz I DUN WANNA FAIL AND RETAKE!!!! ALL I WANT IS A C+ AND ABOVE ONLY!!!!!

Now i'm going to live in fear everyday till results are out and i better start reading up too just in case. retest can be just the following day after results are out. The sch also so stupid never let ppl haf the chance to study than wat's the point.......... ARG!!!!!!!!!!!! HELP!!!!! pls pray hard for me that i will pass and get C+ and above haha. me is gready one!!!

So next week attachment starts again oh boy and here comes all the careplans that needs to be done, legs that need to be massage everyday, the lack of slp, the no time for myself to have more slp haha and even more tiring legs during tennis.

Oh BOy!!! so many complaints haha but this time i will try to take my lecturer advice to work smart and dun let the nurses there to take advantage of us student nurses. Wish me Luck!!!

New blogskin

New BlogSkin


Haha LIke my this skin anot ZQ???? Well I like it. Got MTV to watch haha!!! and its also my fav song. Dunno isit legal anot but its should be bah since the designer of this skin has the copyright thingie. This time round finish editing the skin in 15 mins. haha new record. the previous blog i did it in bout 45 mins. great improvement. I'm getting better in this kind of stuff. ( haha self praise!!!)

Since its 1am already so this marks my last day of attachment. Yeah So happy coz can rest my tired and i do mean very very tired legs. but after exams (2weeks) its back to the ward for attachment again. 3 weeks again haiz somemore its women ward. Haiz no cute guys to see this time round. Tokking bout cute guys. this time attachment very gd coz got a cute guy admitted in the ward i'm working in now. so life in the ward not so boring. Somemore he is in the cubicle that i'm taking care of haha!!! GOt Shuai Ge to see so not so boring. This time round there are a few youngsters so life during attachment is must livier. And i dun mean those little boys as in Sec sch hor but at least the same age as moi or slightly older haha. Everyday see old ppl very sianz one. LAter i also feel old. HAHAHA!!!! Life is so tiring in ward so need something to live things up haha!!!!!

Next attachment in Women ward guess will only see shuai ge if there are doctor interns which is like very impossible haha!!! guess it will be boring.....

Nothing much to update lah coz in the want to slp mode liao. legs super tired.Oh and this wednesday i met Jeremy Zhan. Its really a long time since i saw him. face change a fair bit but his eyes still look the same and character still bout the same haha. Attachments are really letting me to meet ppl that i never see for a long long time liao. First it was Afiq than norliana and sarifah and now jeremy.But when will i meet my pri sch pals. Dunno if we see each other will we still recognize each other anot haha!!! i guess not bah. i sure wun recognize them but i easy to recongize bah coz no change in the way i look at all. only look more mature bah haha!! OLD>>>>>>>>>>>>>

k box

Chu San k box outing


Today is the third day of CNY so bengi and i went to hitler's house to bai nian. Long time never go her place liao. Her sister to tall and big already. Kids all grow up so fast. This means i'm getting older too :( but......... i still dun look like my age so its a bonus haha..........



So anyway three of us went to k box. Too bad this time ZQ cannot come along. Anyway today K lunch was cheaper than K nite though both are priced $9+++. weird. K lunch was more worth it lah coz got lunch mah WAHAHA!!!!!!


picture time.....


Engross singing.....



Next Song pls.......



When will it be MINE turn???



Finally........ Sheng Qing de
zai chang ge.



FOOD.........



Bengi and I had the same set.
This one is almost eaten
already than take one.




So after K, we went to take neoprint. HAHA ZQ not around we never take together. She miss her chance again. ZQ......NEXT TIME then we all take togther okie. Its been long since i last took neoprint wif bengi they all.. Thought the effects not as gd as the last time i took we my attachment frens but i still i like it haha........ P.S next time we choose a better machine wif more effects and more choices.





























Surprise!!!!!!! video of bengi singing haha. Hope u dun mind me putting it up..... if it bothers you than sms me i will take it down ASAP. Here's the link...

cny

Chinese New Year

Now is bout 120am and its Chinese New Yr. Juz now went out to BP wif Bengi and ZQ to tok tok. Wanted to go starbucks but it was close. Lucky Mac was open. So in the end we sat for bout 3hrs there tokking and crapping.

Yst went to Chinatown after work. Lucky it was not so crowded. Saw many ppl Q-ing for Bak Gua as usual. Ppl buying those goodies and those mix and match sweets. HEHE i bought some too. spent bout 3 bucks on it. I somemore already pick the stall seeling the cheapest one.




The crowd.... Many ppl were
taking pictures and so was I.




Wanted to take more but i
was kinda tired from work
so went home first. Next yr
still got chance



Wish Everyone A happy Lunar New Year and everything will go smoothly!!!!!!!!!!

update....

UPDATES.......


One week finally pass. Been having attachment and boy was it tiring. Everyday go home slp only. there is no way i can study for exams liao. Look like i have to crash course during the 4 days study break. Why 4 days??? coz friday i have a paper. the sch really so stingy. cannot gif us one whole week or two to study. Attachment very tiring leh somemore not enough time to study. like that how to pass. Must feedback during the evaluation. HAHA.

Got so many stories to tell but cannot say anything coz haf to protect the patients. But wif my big mouth, i will sooner or later will start tokking bout it. But must remb to say Patient X like this and like that............. haha!!!

Thursday and Friday went to health promotion board to do sch health service so it was abit relax and sit most of the time haha. my poor legs. the veins are all coming out again. Anyway i went to Jurong Pri Sch. din go to sec sch coz of chinese new yr. Half day in sch. In the end, we juz sat in the HPB lecture hall for half a day and went to their clinic for bout 1 and a half hour. so shiok!!!


Here are the pictures i took at Jurong Pri Sch















Their building look like HDB flats
Dun you agree. Nice surroundings
though!!!

Fren house

Visit to Fren House...

Today went to Sui chan's house ( the aunty from my klass) together wif the gals from china. Qiao Qiao, Su Duan, Guo Ai, Chen Juan and Ya fang. Estelle was suppose to be there too but she last minute got something so not there. Anyway let the pictures do the tokking.





Singing K

Qiao Qiao the one holding the
mike was so cute when she
was singing.


Taking a break from singing


Ya Fang and Chen Juan
enjoying themselves


The gals took the chance to
use the internet to chat with
their frens and some guy
from china haha


This is the guy from china.
Pic not clear somemore wif
lines dunno why like that



Grp chatting with the guy.
Mind you were having a
teleconference tok.
Guo Ai even said that
the guy is a lucky coz got
4 of them tokking to him.
haha!!


Another picture of him.
( he not bad looking leh when
i saw his pic on the web cam)
He look better when he was
smiling . ok.... too much crap
on a stranger all the way
from china.


grp pic

pics in my hp

Pictures in my hp



studying for bio ICA last month.
use so many bks to juz study one
module 3 chapters.

little children listening to teacher

telling stories haha!!! tis is during

clinical lab session. my grp were

the outcast coz we were busy

preparing for ICA. Took tis pic when

we were done.

3 of my grp members out of 7 of us.

best sub- grp i ever had!!!!

these were taken during tennis today


this was taken while waiting

for my turn. like this pic best

coz it looks natural with the

guys walking pass. din had the

intention to include them in the

pic.


All the miss balls

Action taking place.

New blogskin

HAHA i love this blog skin coz got he jun xiang. Took some time to do it coz not very familiar with the codes so haf to take some time too see where to put wat. blogskin.com not bad. next time i can see wat nice ones they haf than can change new one. Sonce now cannot upload songs to bloggie so guess new entertainment is to find new skins and change it often haha.

Shermeen its easy to do leh so many you should give it a try. just can to see properly where to put the codes can already but muz remb to save the old codes first before editing it. juz in case in din work out and stuff.

Time to slp now byebye........

long day

Wah today in sch did nothing but wait for time to pass by. So many hours of breaks in between one lecture. So sian. In the end i did the same thing which is to slp to pass time. Today really slp very long and deep. So Shiok!!!

Nothing much happen today till it was time to go home. Oh well that bitch did it again by screaming around scolding ppl for no reason just coz Alvin from my klass laugh while eveyln was trying to figure out a questions with the lecturer during tutorial. Its like wat is the problem wif her. she can tok and make all the noise while others are asking a question or giving a presentation how come others cannot. some more that laugh is a soft that i din even hear it. i tink that gal must go see doctor liao. today i make some comment to myself than she heard it and start starring at me. WTF i relly feel like telling her off. mayb i should juz do that. no more controlling my temper when it comes to her. Dun let her tink i dun answer or argue wif her means i scare of her. must teach her a lesson.

Enough of stupid matters. Anyway today accompany my fren estelle to wait for her fren kevin. an Ex colleague of estelle. Anyway both of them are malaysians for info which i dunno why haha. just want to say it. Estelle fren look really familiar. like see him dunno from where haha. just can't place him. or mayb his features look like someone else i see before. Quite freindly and tokkable but me anti social as usual so din tok much haha. Oh ya he not bad looking too haha need to say this but he so fair. he is like a cloud whereas me and estelle are like dark clouds going to rain soon. haha wat a funny way to explain. guess thats bout it for today. nothing much going on.

Attachment coming soon arh................................. there goes my beauty slp for 3 weeks!!!

help..............

I'm suppose to be memorizing my stuff for ICA later in the morning but too many things wanna say. TOday on my way to sch saw this incident that i dunno whether to cry to laugh at young ppl nowadays.

In MRT train one carriage would haf bout 3 long row of seats and 2 short row seats at each end. Ok i was like sitting way at the end and this incident happened in the centre where the long rows are. There was this blind guy who entered the train. Obviously he was blind so he cannot see if there are any seats anot ( at the moment there wasn't for ur info). So as the train door closes, this old man bout 60-70 yrs bah gave up his seat and help this blind guy to his seat. And All those young ppl just keep staring at them. These youngsters if dun wanna help than at least dun keep on starring at them. Its so rude. NOwadays ppl just dun give up their seats when they see old ppl or parents with babies and ppl who needs the seat more.

Say other ppl i actually also like that haha!!! i only dun give up my seat if i'm like slping on the train, after attachment, or carrying my super heavy bag and laptop and feeling sick.

Actually got alot of things to say but suddenly not in the mood liao. So fan. I suddenly got to 'zhen li' my feelings again. Suddenly facing so many diff kind of problems than i feel so sianz already with life.


HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

mind in confusion

Damn!!! my mind is now in a 'wat to do' state. Went to see my lecture mentor bout the physiotherapy course. Okay so its die also need A level to get in. I'm now having a mix feelings. At one point i wana finish my nursing course since i've already started it at the other point i dunno where should i continue after getting my diploma. Should i take the A level as a private student anot. THis means i have to study for both "A" and dip. I question myself if can i really handle both anot coz i dun wanna be disappointed again. I've already wasted 2 yrs of my life and i dun wanna waste it anymore.

HOnestly i dunn if i can cope. My nursing now average scores are Bs only than if i take the 'A' would my grades drop that i in the end fail both. Really duno wat to do. Looking at another point, if i forget all bout the physio thingie and concentrate on my nursing, where can i go after that. JUst read on SIM webbie that their part time degree course is 2 yrs and somemore is need to haf at least bout 1-2 yrs experience than take you in. So i guess it leaves with me going to NUS for the degree course is more worth it. but i haben read the crititra such yet so dunno if they take in freash grad in diploma.

Thought of being a paramedic but after u join the civil denfence, u will haf to go through a 2.5yrs course thought u get paid while doing it i think. Though this job is really challenging but i wonder if i can really cope with it anot. But beside being a paramedic i dun really know wat else i can do coz i not really interested in working in a ward. Its not as appealing as being a paramedic. Wat other jobs can i hold that is associated with nursing??? Teaching?? not really my cup of tea. Or should i change course when i enter uni??? There is a few courses that accepts all diplomas but they are mostly the studey of languages or behaviour science. And that means it links back to being in the teaching profession.

Another way of me being able to study physio is going overseas coz they haf a foundation course which one can do before starting the degree course but all these need money and now i cannot afford such thing though its said by my fren that you can study and work part time as a nurse. Overseas pays alot but i still cannot afford the sch fees there and accomodations and stuff. This is the time how i wish a million dollars would be bestow on me. I not greedy, a million bucks would do.

I guess i'm feeling this way coz my little hope of being a physiotherapist has been broken and i dunno wat to do already. The main idea of me joining nursing is so that there is a stepping stone for me to make a head start but guess it does not work that way coz its reality we are tokking esp in singapore. Paper qualification is still very important. Only with gd grades can it get you to where you wanna be.

Thinking back, ppl in m klass all joined nursing coz they wanna be a nurse. They haf a goal that they want but my goal is different from them rite from the start. I guess this is where i lose out to them. Yeah i may get better grades than some of them but at least they are happy with wat they are doing but as for me everything is i'm okay doing it only. The passion is not there.

During the talk, my lecturer also told me that ppl's piorities do changes as one gets older. After that he started to tok funny. Saying that when i reach 24, 25 i would wanna get marry. haf a family and stuff and i was like OMG!!! I wanted to rebuke him saying as if anyone wants me HAHA!!! he was hurting my sore point man!!!

Should i just give up on being a physio and continue being a nurse or should i take the risk by taking the 'A' level?????

First post of the yr ( very long)

Juz updated to another new song for the new yr haha!! I should be changing quite often if free coz recently got a few songs i like mainly coz it reflects to how i'm feeling or other that the song is really gd in terms of singing,tune and lyrics.

Well i would say that Shan Hu Hai is the best song in 2005 in my opinion. I really love this song. lyrics is also very different from others that we haf seen in these few yrs. Well mayb there are better songs but i did not haf the chance to come across it so i guess Shan Hu Hai is the best one in 2005. Well there are also many other songs i like but it cannot be place in 1st place haha.

Well the background song you guys are listening to now is from this hk serial titled ' the last breakthrough'. If you haf scv than you should know wat show i'm tokking about. This show is about a grp of healthcare workers doing volunteer work in africa mainly in the state kenya. The setting that they broadcast really shows that Kenya is a beautiful place in terms of nature. One day if i got the money i would also like to visit Kenya. Anyway tis show is rather inspiring.

After studying nursing i realize i'm even more in shows that is bout healthcare. So funny haha!!
Well sch is starting soon haiz..... and i also juz finish watching the lastest vcd i bought. this one was recommanded in the newspaper and it was good. Thought not as captivating as Loveholic but its good enough for me to not touch the forward button if u know wat i mean.

After watching all these korean shows i just dun understand something. How come after students graduate from sch already than the student and teacher cannot be in a relationship leh. Why do ppl oppose to such thing. Yeah they be student and teacher relation in the past but that is all in the pass already. Now everyone is a grown up and love is a free thingie. Its not as if they had a relationship during the sch days or wat. Is it really wrong?? I dun know. I guess there must be such things thats why they film such things bah. Or mayb the writer is just fascinating ( dunno if spell correctly) I guess thats why there is this chinese phase bout a teacher is like your parents or is it once a teacher always a teacher. Something like that lah.

Suddenly i just feel like telling this guy that i like him but so many things are pulling me back. The first main reason is juz look at me. No 'tiao jian' at all later become laughing stock haha..... 2nd leh wat if cannot even be frens how leh. see so many ppl around me after expressing their feelings than all cannot be frens liao coz so awkward........ 3rd leh he already got someone he like liao. mayb they already ina relationship though he never say anything bout it.

I guess this is the part where i lose to shermeen and bengi bah. At least they dare to express their feelings to the person they like. Really salute to them!!!! Feeling real sad now somemore now listening to Shan Hu Hai and this lyrics just sung pass ' ai qin mian qiang bu lai'.

Just now tokking to him than he ask wat is my new yr resolution. Dun know wat to tell him haha.... so was thinking bout it than i think i wanna go improve my tennis skills and be in sch team by next yr. That means must ask coach to teach more often liao at low rates. wonder if coach still haf those wednesday klass anot or else can go. but in 3 weeks time i got attachment so haf to see bout it bah. At least haf a gd year before i leave though i'm making plans to do another course which means 3 more yrs in nyp. See how it goes bah coz i might haf to do the A level as a private student while doing my nursing course. Dunno if can cope anot since i already haf so many ICAs and studying to do. Tuesday will go see mentor to discuss wif him.

Wah really writing alot tonite . just haf to blah out everything. HAHA!!!!!!!

Hope you guys haf a great year ahead and everything will be smooth sailing..........

Last day of 2005!!!

OKay i juz read back wat i wrote in my previous entry and i was like 'OMG wat the hack was i blahhing about?????' All those whinning and stuff phew!!!!

Ok wat did i do this whole 1 year. In Jan, Feb and March, i was busy writing letters (which applies to apeal letters too) to apply to study phsiotherapy. At the same time i opt to go study nursing too thinking that if i cannot get into physio than at least i haf a back up. Well studying nursing can also be my stepping stone into studying phsio. Beside settling my education stuff i also went to take driving lessons. In March alone i completed bout 4/5 of whole course coz i almost everyday also go for lessons. HOwever only in Nov did i get my driving license after failing for 2 times. finally pass in the 3rd attempt.

April was the beginning of the nursing course which meant my apeal failed. sad sia!!! Anyway during orientation there was tis gal who walk towards me and asked if where we were waiting is the venue for the orientation. Well its fated coz later i got to know her in my 1st attachment. drum roll..................... ying ying is the gal i was tokking about. haha

So after that nothing much happen in the later part of the year except for cat fights in my klass, ppl trying to test my limit of tolerance etc. So drama sia!!!!!!!!!! Beside that i sign up for CSC and tennis so is like very sat go for tenis thats why so dark and tan liao haha!!! and also went for volunteer work like going to old folks home and help out in the BDD ( blood donation drive). Thought not much but its a start to wat i wanna do.

Well wat i can say the best part of tis year was attachment. Wirking in the hospital is so diff from wat we read from books, learn from books, watch from tv shows. From the attachment i learned more bout myself being able to do all those stuff that i thought i could not do. I even face difficulties cause by unreasonable patient. I was really upset with wat he did, badmouthing me infront of everybody just because he was in a bad mood when i go take his readings. Really suppress alot of feelings at that time till my lecturer came to tok to me.

Really glad my lecturer and the ward sister whom my lecturer tok to regaring the incident din blame me and understand the situation. I was told not to take it too harshly coz this kind of things do happen and just haf to take it easy. Te only gd thing that came out from this incident was that next time i wun be so piss off by such things already coz got experience liao hahaha!!!
MOst importantly is i do my job well and rite than there is no chance for other to blame me or try to harm me coz i din everything my rules and regulations and am answerable to myself.

Last thing bout the attachment was of course the new frens i made. Actually its nice making new frens than when all free, all can go out and just chill out haha!!!

This year also nothing happening. The diff this yr from other yrs is that i went to sing K with frens. this is something i never do in previous yrs. All this must thank Lin Jun Jie. you know why????????? coz his album gave free voucher to sing at K so dun waste haha. thats when i started going to K box. Wahaha wat a lame reason !!!!!!!! Actually i like to sing but i can only sing quite ok when alone. even i know the song and tune but if got toher ppl i tend to just sing out of tune somehow. haha some kind of weird phobia.

The last thing that happen to moi in tis yr would be me liking this guy bah. HAHA!!!!!!!! Sound so werid. First time really liking someone. BAd part is that he has someone he like already and of course my Zi Bei Gan plays a part too haha!!! I can face everything bravely and stuff but when it comes to this kind of thingie, my Zi Bei Gan super powerful. No confidence like shit!!!! HAHA!!!!!!!! Gan Qing Ze Zhong Shi Hai Zhen Fan Leh!!!!

Guess this last day of 2005 would be spending it like any other day liao coz outside would be too crowded for me to go watch the fireworks. I really wanna go watch fireworks. So big liao but never once seen fireworks live only on tv. haiz........ Even if wanna go despite the crowds, no one also want to go with moi.

Siging off by lonely gal with a lonely heart with a tear to say good bye to 2005..........


P.S i'm really getting very crappy and emotional and ..................... i also dunno

Late in the nite.........

Wah just finish my english essay. Guess wat. I found out the content that i've wrote is out of point so i had to rewrite it. WTH..... i somemore was almost done with it. ARGGGGG!!!!! Qi Si Wo LE!!!!!!!!!! but i finsh it already finally !!!!!!!! juz found out that i now haf developed a habit of sleeping at 7pm sharp. just before dinner haha. these few days my mum always haf to wake me up for dinner. the best part is that i alwasy fall asleep in this senario....... my laptop on with music playing away and light on. I would always be sleeping on my little pillow instead of my normal pillow.

Waa juz surfing around and found this info in the forum. Dear frens born in 1985 like moi pls take note....


Oxz in 2006 the only star that is protecting ox this yr is the moon.. moon favoured woman..thus this yr ox ladies would hv better luck than the man... ox ppl have to beware of law suite, xiao ren career failure... they r about 7 bad stars affecting ox ppl.. they also fan bian chng tai shui..haiz..causing luck to fall till rock bottom.. so remember to pai tai shui ya..n remember to take vegeterian on the 15th of the lunar month.

1985> they might b a lot of changes happening this yr... its better to stay calm n avoid such changes... its beeter not to hv any form of investment be is financially or emotionally..cause the result would not b good.

Argggggg cannot invest financially or emotionally so sad sia!!!! must be as cold and solid as ice liao coz cannot invest emotionally or else will back fired haha!!! well actually it does not matter to me at all coz whether isit a gd or bad year, it does not make a diff at all. LIfe has been so dull and erm.......... cannot find the word to describe wat i wana say now so watever. haha!!!

Actually wanna say my life as always been the same all these years. Every year is like so routine. watever i do is alwasy the same and with the same people. Festive season spent it with the same people or by myself. Birthday i also only spent with family. Go out leh i most of the time go out alone. Watch move always alone and harry potter is with my mum for all episodes okay. Its been like that since i think the say i was in pri sch bah. NOt that i wanna complain though at least i still haf my family but sometimes i need a change too but got no one to call out coz all not free or ppl i wanna call out i dun dare to ask them out for the fear of rejections haiz. Those ppl that are free i dun like to hang out with them coz to me they are just so faked and pathentic ( well in my opinion).

Guess my life as been really pathentic and lifeless!!!! Now i guess all i can do is to wait for a miracle to happen on me!!!! WAHAHA!!!!!!! if my life can be as little interesting as this character in this show 'my name is kim sam soon' that would be nice ( excluding the part that she sign some contract to be the guy 'gf' for money to prevent her house from being taken away by debtors her dead dad owe) though are are a few up and downs haha well life ain't smooth sailing. oh this show arh i buy the vcd liao than that stupid SCV advertise that they are goin to show it next year!!!!!!! ARHHHHHHH QI SI WO LE!!!!!! waste my money. This tell me not to buy shows that has high rating coz SCV will show it one. All i have to do is wait!!!!!!!!!!

Guess juz now wrote too much in my essay so now down here blahing away. cannot slp so is like this hahaha!!!!!! i guess blogging is a gd way for me to just write off my feeling away to make moi feel better!!!!!!!!! BTW will be changing background music again so remb to come back to listen to it. haha!!!!!!!!!

out out out...........

Today finally got my butt out of the house to go buy my shoes for attachment. Well actually yesterday was already out for half a day to go take my hep B injection at the polyclinic. Wasted most of my time waiting. All because i lost my paper to prove that i've taken the 1st and 2nd dose. This resulted in travelling to and fro from jurong and bukit batok and wasted 6 bucks coz that stupid prove need to buy one haiz.......... Guess wat......... polyclinic is not as cheap its suppose to be. The stupid injection cost me 25 bucks!!!!!!!! and at SATA it only cost 15 bucks. A $10 diff. wat the hack!!!!! Polyclinic is suppose to be real cheap so that poor ppl like me can afford to go to see the doctors. Guess next time when it comes to vaccines i would go to SATA instead and pls god dun ever let them be out of stock for drugs!!!!

Today finally got my shoes and boy its kinda Ex. It costed 59 bucks and its upper part is made out of leather. guess thats why its ex and its already on sale. Well hope this pair can last or else wasted coz its so Ex!!!!!!

Today i also bought a small little pillow that babies used one for sch. now when sleeping in the library got pillow to sleep on and when wake up wun haf those lines print on my face haha. Dun know baby stuff would cost so much. just a small pillow can haf a range of $5-$10. all the same wat dunno why so ex. of course i bought the cheapest one and it was also the last one. Anyway today was quite a fruitful day. AH!!! din buy the clothes i wanted to buy coz it look diff from the pictures i saw. After seeing it wif my own eyes, the clothes just din suit me and it was not very practical for me to wear to sch coz it would be too hot to wear in. double layer and somemore its long sleves. thought i stay in air con room for a long period of time but how bout when i'm under the hot sun???? sure die of heat. today still can;t find the right shorts for tennis. all till knee lenght or else too small. haiz need to find one set of sports wear for tennis in my size or else my tan would look so weird. Actually i juz need a shorts would be slightly above my knee. mayb go sch see if they sell anot and got size.

Today on my way home i saw someone that look like joson but should not be him. That guy features really look like joson. i tink when he grows older, (not that he is not old enough haha) he would haf that guys looks bah. the more mature look haha!!!

So fast sch going to start soon and i'm only 3/10 done with my english essay and i haben finish doing my drug calculation worksheet yet for tutorial. these two days better finish it up.

signing off coz too long liao................

Christmas.......

Juz came back from my cousin place. Had christmas dinner but din really eat at all coz had turkey and stuff already on christmas eve and christmas day eat the same thing again so not very interested but the mango sorbet that my cousin bought was nice had two servings of those haha. Well me is a mango freak!!! anway recieved a few christmas presents and OMG almost all of them are chocolates. got some of my fav kind and one of my aunt who is now working in japan even DHL her chocolate presents over. WAH chocolates from japan. it looks nice but the 'weird' flavours it has is not my kind of taste haha. BEst of all, the kind that i like that has hazelnut cream in the choc, my dad got those so that means i can eat them coz my dad has too many pimples on his face so i guess he would be eating it haha.

So far thats bout it. next week need to go for hep B jab coz they ran out of stock so din get it done. do my english essay. was too lay to do it. Ermmmmmm wat else arh.......... buy shoes and some new clothes that i spoted haha i seem to be buying too many clothes liao this semester. next semester i think got to buy less liao.


Anyway Merry Christmas to all and Happy Boxing Day!!!!

memories coming back

Just saw my fren blog and come to know his grandmother passed away. After reading it memories just came flashing back. 4 yrs ago my grandmother also passed away and i would never ever forget that day. It was also the day i really start to hate that Raja. Coz of his stupid die also must go tutorial i would haf at least seen the last of my grandmother. I was already prepared to go to the hospital on that day than he suddenly drop the bomb that all must stay back for lessons.

Remembered ever since the funeral, i everynite cry myself to sleep for a few months. everytime alone doing nothing than will start to cry. was really sad. till i got to tell myself to snap out of it. Was really close to my grandmother. I could tell her anything under the sun. things that i dun even tell my mum i can tell her. After she was gone, i got no one to really tok to liao. Things that can't be said are all kept in a big corner of my heart. Thinking back it was really a hard time for me. In front of others haf to put on a false front as if i'm ok but actually i'm not. haiz.... that year when anyone tok bout grangmothers i would be like crying away. even that yr when taking O level oral one question was about grandparents, i was like tearing and answering the question. I muz had scared those testers.

Anyway hope my fren will take it easy as time do really heal all wounds but a scare would be there so as not to forget this special person that was once a part of our life.

nothing to look back..........

Today only had one hour of lecture that why now so early at home slacking. Next week is the start of my 2 weeks holiday so guess i have one whole list of things to do. Let me see......

1) Do my 1000 Word english essay.
2) Remb to go for my Hep B injection
3) CLean up my room
4) Do abit of revision
5) Go out, go Out and go out but no body call me out or fly my aeroplane :(
6) learn to play a song or 2 on the piano. ( hope my skills not too rusty)
7) Slp more and just stay in lala land coz dun feel there's any hope in this world liao haha
8) buy shoes for attachment

Guess thats bout it bah. THINGS TO DO LIST!!!

Well just recieve sms from shermeen that she cannot make it to tonite's dinner so Bengi and I cancel the whole thing and decide next week than go. Haiz Everytime i call them out than all last minute tell me cannot go. Never seems to at least once i call them out than all can come out. Everytime ppl fly my aeroplane. Haiz really wanna go out!!!!!!! Guess destine to be alone.

Last nite was watching tv than suddenly this thought juz flash across my mind. I practically haf no life at all. Everyday is such a routine since 3 yrs ago. 1st yr: work than go home, work than go home. 2nd yr: sch than home sch than home. 3rd yr(this yr): sch then home, sch than home. Nothing interesting has happen in my life, no miracle or surprise has ever happen to me. Its already the end of the year but i still leading a a so call 'floating life' bah. So far the only 'happening' thing that happen was my attachment but after that nothing. Such a sad case.

Everyone around me all got something happening around them. whether isit gd or bad but they haf something to focus on and look forward to. HOwever i dun seem to haf anything to look forward at all. well mayb only my exam results bah. wat a joke!!! 2 more weeks to 2006 liao, i hope something there is at least something in 2005 to remember.

Mental status: very very very tired

Holiday After Tomolo

Finally finish my last ica today . It has been hectic since bout 1 month ago as every week there is one ica and even 2 in one week so very stressful to only some extend. Well so far got back only 2 results out of 4 test. Clinical practical test passed and my Bio, the most impt module, well i pass this one too and its a B+. A gd improvement as compared to last term. Somemore my lecturer who was the one who set the paper said it was hard and most people would fail. What a scare i tell you when i heard this. Thanx god i pass.

Today ica was not too bad hope my group can at least can an A for it. I can finally have a good rest. Was very busy this week coz of all the last minute changes and practises and smsing of my grp members for meetings- All for this ICA. Its really tiring to be a leader coz everything you haf to oversee and do it yourself, make sure ur members are doing stuff too and somemore i haf very high expectations but i enjoy doing it. Well i guess i still like to be a leader. haha Really have to thank my grp members for tolerating me for being so long winded haha and for all of their hard work.

Well nothing much happen this week except for being woken up at around 3 something in the morning. Was really pissed off on that day coz i just slept bout an hour or so than the sms came. Worst of all, I could not go back to slp after that no matter how i try and try and try and i had morning lectures somemore. Best of all i kinda doze off in lecture and i tink my lecturer saw me but before she could do anything i woke up already haha lucky me. I guess if its another lecturer that i know i might haf die of embrassement already. Was pissed off but amused on that day when that sms came. Well my vocab very PTE so dunno wat other words to used than amuse to describe my feelings on that day. HAHA anyway wat a joke!!!!

This taught me to always slient my hp and expect for the unexpected.

///can't sleep////

Well well feeling tired but dunno why still cannot sleep. haiz alot of things going on in my mind guess thats why i'm still not in lala land. 8 more hours to go and i would be having my tennis lesson. Its been 3 weeks since i last played hope later on can still remember how to play haha!!

Thursday was a crazy nite. In the afternoon i went to see my lecturer to ask her take a look in my group's ica presentation to make sure we ain't side tracking. In the end we did side track so i had to like change almost the whole presentation information and format and fronts and pictures and background. But I'm kinda amazed wif myself for being able to finish it up last nite and it was of standard okay. Everything is now done and ready for next week's presentation. Settled stuff my group members had to say and things they had to memorize. Hope we can get a good grade for this module. I think after this module, my grp members might not wanna be in the same grp as me already esp Nazri haha coz he is the lazy one and i had to actually threaten him in a nice way to help him pull up his socks haha!! Looking back, i was like so nagging coz everytime sms them to remind them to come for meetings, asking them to do their part of the work and stuff. Well i may not be outspoken most of the time and juz keep quiet in klass but when it comes to project and esp if i'm in charge, i'm like a totally different person. The dommineering ( forget how to spell this word) me would come out and thats it. Demanding, do things must be of qaulity, everything must be in order, well plan, no nonsense and stuff. Guess this is the only time they will see the "BAD" side of me hahahahaha!! However in exchange for gd grades its worth it to bear with me ain't it haha!!

So many things going through my head now and things i'm curious with but dare not ask haha. Still thinking bout it and hoping for it but oh well things have to take its natural course.

Juz deleted so many episodes of naruto from my lappy and WOW my lappy now haf so much space to spare. Oh boy does it really takes up space.


Guess its time to try to slp now or else not energy to play tomolo. Can't wait!!!!! TENNIS!!!!!

The long awaited day...........

YEAH!!!! Today was the day of my horrible bioscience test and its over!!! So happy. One stressful module and i think i should be able to pass!!!

Event of the day was that i finally watch Harry Potter!!! The show was not bad wat dunno why ppl say not nice and it was boring. ????? all over haha!!! Ain't all movies bout the same too??? Well it was funny but a pity so many stuff was cut off. Not the same as the book. so sad. I dun mind sitting 3hours just to watch the whole thing if its the same as the book haha.

Something i just realized. All the series of harry potter i actually watch it with my mum even this one today. The first series i watched it wif my bro and mum, the 2nd one with my mum, as for the 3rd one, i actuaaly haf no memery of watching it at all!!! Someone must haf cast a spell on me and took it away from me haha. Anyway and even this 4th series i watch it wif my mum. OMG!!!! i better get a life though watching it wif my mum was not bad well coz part of it she is paying haha!!! Its like so sad i actually could not get anyone i would like to go wif to watch it. See how little frens i haf. But oh well I'm fussy in choosing frens so how can i complain!!! ONly ppl you feel comfortable wif and you trust than can call frens in my dictionary. Not everyone i know is call a fren or else this word fren as lost its meaning already. Dun you agree???

Oh well hope the 5th series i get to go with other ppl instead of my mum haha!!!

Wednesday pls come soon.........

Time Check: 3am



Tired of studying so writing a blog now. NOw in the process of my crush study of bioscience........ so sianz. Yesterday gif up already so went to see the doctor for my stupid, dun wanna recover cough. Took the medicine so now coughing not so bad like the last few days as if my lungs are ready to come up. Bad part is that everytime i take the medicine, i feel drowsy and wanna slp. HOW TO STUDY!!!!! Everytime i start to study mayb bout an hour only than i start to fall aslp. No matter how i try not to slp, in the end the medication took over my will power. Medication is a powerful drug. No wonder ppl die in the hands of drugs whether isit for gd or evil. haha crapping again.

Super sianz arh. Now only 1 person online but he also busy doing hw so dun wanna bother him which means no one to tok to. Sianz Sianz Sianz......... So many stuff to study haiz........ hope wednesday quickly come soon. and my nitemare will be over soon. than can relax abit and play haha than it will be back to do the finishing touch of my group's project. Still haben think how to make the presentation interesting and stuff. This lecturer kinda strict ( looking from the outside) but see how it goes bah coz there will be 2 grps doing it first next week and my grp is in the following week. Good chance for me to observed the lecturer expectations. haha!!! and steal some ideas from other grps and modify them as if its my idea like that. Me no creative person but good at modifying till its my idea haha evil me!!!

new song

Haha!! new background song again. Its jay chou and lara sing one. Shan Hu Hai. I can't believe i am actually listning to jay's song and loving it esp lang man shou ji. Wanted to put this song up instead but it was too big so put shan hu hai instead. my sencond fav song from jay's lastest album. Er..... well actually i only listening to this two songs coz saw the mtv and fell in love with it. Wat a first man!!! Me liking Jay's songs. haha!!

Anyway this week had clinical lab practical and theory test. Finally its over and i pass my practical. My elective question which was oral medication did super well haha 28/30. thats a high marks leh. if only i knew how to ans one of the question the tester ask than mayb i could have got full marks. Dressing was okie at least i passed it but dunno wat marks but i pass which was like very important coz i think my theory suck big time. mcq was ok except for one question coz read wrongly so the drug calculation was wrong ARGGGGGG hate it when i tink of it. 1 mark like that gone liao haiz........ SAQ kinda suck i think coz din really know wat they were asking for so was guessing away haha as usual. Anyway if my theory at least get a C than my overall marks for this term for clinical lab i can at least get a C and above bah which is like better than a D which i got from last term. so sad to see all the B+ and C+ than suddenly at the bottom a big D. Major shock!!!!

Next week got bio test and i am like taking my own sweet time to study. want to die!!! haha!!! well going to crush study as usualy for bio. Me and sci just dun click at all. cannot study too early or else by the time for test i would forget everything. Oh well looking forward to next wednesday too coz i would end at 12pm than can go watch Harry Potter liao!!! YEah!!!! wait so long liao. Most of my frens all gone to watch liao except me haiz... guess will be going alone as usual again. Lonely me!!! well i better get use to it since i wun really haf anyone to..................... .......................

Guess after my 1029 module ICA which is like 2 weeks later than will go out and do all those stuff i wanna do bah. Bengi should be on holiday liao so can call him out. ZQ i tink got ICAs and test too bah. Shermeen leh........ busy working so mayb call her out in the nite to go sing K. HOpefully by that time my cough is okie liao. I've been like coughing for one whole week liao. Juz dun wanna go see doctor. I think wait till i going to cough to death than go see bah!!!

thoughts!!

每当我想慢慢的忘记你, 你却又进入了我的世界.

sick...

haiz having a stupid flu. cough cough cough and sneeze sneeze sneeze. fever leh only come in the nite. Tuesday and wednesday got test but everytime take medicine i start to slp how to really study. ARG!!!!!!!!!! help me!!!!!! and here i am wasting time writing this blog haha how ironic!!!

THE ATTACK OF THE FLU BUGGIE!!!!!!!!!!

不想了

我喜欢的人,有喜欢的人了!! 决定不想了.祝他们幸福快乐. Why think of something that is never ever likely to happen. 反正已经习惯一个人了!!! 但是我比一般人幸福多了.因为我有亲情和一群好朋友!!!

So many test coming up and here i am still trying to forget. Guess i should go bury myself under my books!!! Anyway finish watch deveil beside you last monday i think. I totally like the main lead he junxiang. When i first saw him i was like he so familiar. So after some searching haha i remember he was the new host i saw fews yrs back in entertainment news. At that time i totally like him but coz of O levels or was it N levels so never watch E-news and stuff than forgot all bout it. Woo HOo. now can watch him act and stuff so gd. Think going to buy Love contract that show haha he so shuai!!! will upload his pic later when free!!!!!!!

Gone soon......

I'm emotionally unstable now at this point. I've so many things i wanna say but i can't. There are things i want to say to different ppl but i can't. I want to say my 真心话 also cannot. I think i better stop watching all those taiwan idol shows anymore esp those romance one or else i might break down sooner or later.

Why am I so weak now??? I really question myself. I use to be able to hide certain feelings but now i can't. I always have this 冲动 to say my 真心话. Isit coz i'm getting older or I'm getting naive??? I juz deleted one whole lot of stuff i wanted to say . guess its not really suitable to put it up. This question is like going throught my mind now. Am i really a nobody in other ppl eyes?? No one really bother to remember wat i say or wat they promise me. I always keep my promises to ppl but why other always treat me like a joke!!! Isit really so hard to just inform me?? Or isit i project myself as the dun care kind of person, a strong person who can deal every problem myself. After living 20 years ++ i'm now starting to haf a identity crisis. I'm now holding up so many information, so many emotions that i really want to unleash it. These few years of problem is weighing me down too much already.

When i wanna tok to someone bout something happy or wat just to relax, when i look around, there is no one that i can really tok to. Everyone around me seem to have found someone they can tok to, share with but i haben. I just haben found someone in klass that share my same interest or me sharing the same interest as others. I guess i never will. Guess it will be a lonely 3 years. I'm not really tokking anymore already in klass. Just dun have the urge to open up anymore. I dun want to put up all those pretenious laughter or smiles anymore.

I'm really tired.....................

All bout today!!!

TOday finally drove my dad's car and.................................. it was pretty good. haha. in less than 3 mins i manage to park the car and it was without poles ok!!! Really felt different coz it was a big car as compared to the school's car. The funniest thing that was my mum telling me no i should do this and that while driving. I had to like SHhhhhhhhhhh her so many times. at least she after that keep quiet coz she understand how its like for someone to keep saying this and that while driving. COz she been there be4.HAHAHA!!!

2 weeks or rather 1 week more than got clinical lab practical and theory tests. haiz damn scared man coz i hate to fail again. and i wanna do well too. I DUN WANNA a D liao in practical!!!! After that got bio science test and i like never study yet. somemore got 3 big chapters haiz.....

Change my background song again. I like this song alot coz it somehow reflects how i feel recently.

dunno wat to say already!!!! got to study.....................

烦死了!!!

我好像喜欢上他了!! 我好像喜欢上一个不能爱的人! 我能爱他吗?? 烦死了! 第一次真 的喜欢一个人.....会有结果吗? 我想太多了!! Only the blind would like me for who i am bah!!!

Sick........

Yesterday had to take panadol before i could sleep. I've been so worried and tired out from all the drving lessons after long hours of school that i finaly broke down feeling sick last nite. Today in klass i could not even concentrate and was like sleeping in lectures. mental and emotional breakdown. This tiredness was worst than attachment. it was like 50% worst. I totally break down after i came home from sch. just had to sleep.

Actually still cannot believe i actually pass. After failing twice i was on the verge of giving up trying already. Guess i put too much pressure on myself. Everytime i fail i dunno how to face my parents coz the fees are so high and failing means more money have to go out to the driving center. STRESS!!! but its all over already.

When any interesting happened today........... erm......... nothing much beside one of my klassmate got scolded by one of the lecturer looking at a photo in her klass. yeah my klassmate was wrong to look at the photo during klass but i guess the lecturer din handle the problem rationally still treating is like little kids. not gifing us face at all by scolding her in front of the whole lecture grp of 100 over ppl. We ain't kids anymore!!

Today i realize that the germaine ( that stupid gal) has a totally wrong concept of nursing in terms of patients dying. Our lecturer was tokking bout her experience bout how she counsel one student bout seeing patient dying coz it seem that this particular student was very upset over it. Well this lecturer( btw its the same lecturer i'm tokking bout above) commented that after the patient die, wat we nurses can do is by showing the'body' respect, clean up and dress the person properly so that the family and take a last good look at their loved one. This i totally agree with her coz we cannot control the death of anyone so we should do our best to help them look gd so as to gif the family members a piece of mind that he/she has gone away in peace. But that germaine was like this lecturer was bullshitting and stuff. She think she is god arh can control ppl birth and death meh. sometime i'm so amuse how she thinks and look at stuff. So childish and not rational at all. or mayb i've a totally different frequency on how 17yrs old teenagers look at stuff. Although i dun like her but she is so entertaining that it just so fun to watch how she handle problems and stuff. Haha sound so mean!!

Well its a long entry today. juz took medicine so dozing off soon!!!! take care ppl!! next time drive you guys around but muz sign a form that if anything happen i dun haf to be responsible for anything haha!!!!!! me can be a dangerous drive at times so beware and ride at your own risk!!!

a ride anyone???

I passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed i passed


AND I PASSED!!!!! FINALLY!!!!!

3RD ATTEMPT AND FINALLY I PASSED AND GOT MY DRIVING LICENSE!! YIPPIE SO HAPPY!!!

I was so worried that i couldn't slp well, feeling sick, headache, coundn't not even finish my lunch. Wah first time leh left so much food that my fren had to help me eat up my fries.

Oh watever at least i pass !!!!!!!!!!!

Wah so tired now but still haf so much work to do.............. BYez..............

Thought of the Day!!

Instead of letting fate decide your path,
Why not look for fate and control your own destiny with your heart.
The heart that will lead you to the happiness you've been longing for.

reality hit

Okay i think i have been around with too many nice ppl that reality hit me awake once again. TODAY!!! Well today had tennis lessons as usual than one of the ball was hit out to the basketball court by my friend so i went to the fence there to ask those basketball ppl to help get the ball back. ohya the tennis court is at a higher ground i think bout one storey higher than the basketball court. When i was at the court i call out to the guys there but none even bothered to response. i called out a few times and still no response till one of the guy who was on the phone heard me and walk over and ask wat help i needed. FINALLY!!!!!!

Here comes the part that reality arrived before my eyes. Well again the ball went out so me and sarah went over to ask those ppl to get the ball. Well i ask sarah to go ask them instead knowing that those guys there sure will response to her immediately and true enough it did. Its like wat the hack man!!! Ya sarah is like tall and slim and look above average and stuff but those ppl there also haf to see how one looks like than help them meh. As if they all very gd looking like that. The guy on the phone was like even better looking than most of them there. I guess the best part was after they threw the ball over than they try to find out sarah's name but sarah can't even be bothered with them and gave them the back off look. Lusty toad trying to have swan meat. HAHA!!!

Another thing happening around me today was like crazy. After tennis i went out for a while and everywhere around me were couples. In the bus, In the Mrt, In the Lrt. OMG today its not V.dae or wat. They were like all around and some were even acting lovey dovey and stuff.

ITS CRAZY!!!!

In my brain i was like pls do ur lovey dovey elsewhere and spare this poor gal sitting opposite who will never find such happiness like you guys.

Today is really a reality check day!!!!!!!!!

Holiday No More

Great!!! today i just realize i no longer can slack starting from like now onwards. from week 5 to week 10 is like nothing but ICAs, practicals, theory tests. OMG so many in just 5 weeks. All these are stress esp if i fail. This sem my sub grp is like no creative ideas for projects, feeling sianz all the time and wat else .........all the negative effects that might cause us not to gd well.

DANGER DANGER!!!!!

Well as for my the other sub grp for 1029 module, i'm the leader so its adds up more stress. Its like so long since i lead ppl to do stuff. Let me see............ 3 yrs already. It such a long time since i'm a leader. Dunno if i'm still up to it. Well hope i can do it as well as the past or even better and not let my grp down cause i personally wanna get a A for this module coz i've no idea wat is going on in klass haha!!!

Well nothing much to update too so tata.

To ZQ...

Feeling better anot!!! must rest more and eat medicine and if still haf fever use the method i teach you to bring it down. Take care ya!!!

Do you know what kills.......

Juz read one blog. It like so weird coz i'm like wondering wat is going on inside this person mind. What is she exactly thinking and does she knows the truth of what is going on. Its like u think that you know what is going on and thought that you haf it under control but after reading something that can haf two meanings than it makes one wonder mayb i dun really know wat is really going on. It juz keeps you thinking bout it and haf a urge to go confront.

Human being are so hard to predict when you think that you know it all at most time.


I've met my match. Most of the time i'm able to see through ppl by just looking at their expressions even if they are juz acting but now......... i can;t see through this person at all.

Enjoyable Day......

Today klasses as usual in the morning than i was out meeting my attchement frens Zhiqiang, Cuyan, Ying Ying, Benedict, Desmond and Xiao Hui in the afternoon. Well Ying yIng, Des, Xiao HUi and I met Ben at bout 3.10pm at the mrt and off we go to J8 to meet up wif the rest. As Cuyan was fasting coz she wanna lose weight which i dun quite get it coz she is like rather skinny already haha!! so we went to sit at Ajisen first and waited for Zhiquang to come. So the usual thingie we ordered our food and waitied for it and crap throughout the meal. Most of the time Xiao hui and Ben was 'arguing' over some small matter but it was funny. It has been long since i had laugh so much over a meal. It was fun. We should haf more of such next time!!!

So after eating, we walk around the mall. We kinda walk around in circles coz we dun really know our way. J8 is like a maze haha!! so we were like walking around, taking pictures and stuff. Sadly Xiao Hui had to leave early to help her sis relief tution for some pri sch kid. the rest of us juz continue to walk round till we went to pretty pix watever that shop is call. coz we had like 5 bucks to spare we neoprint we took. Its like so many yrs since i last took neoprint.

HIGHLITE OF THE DAY!!!--- all of us except cuyan were like mountain tortise coz we din really know how that machine work. It was like so fast b4 we could even prepare for the next shot. We were like so noisy laughing and a little screaming saying hurry hurry quick quick. anyway its so funny. Well at least most of the pictures came out nice but coz of the time limit and dunno how to do it thingie ying ying and i chose the pics quickly but ramdomly not even hafing time to really see and choose . haha sorrie guys chose all the pictures wif all the gals in front.



Ben so call make up was really scarry and we were like making fun of him all day111 poor guy but as long he is in the photo it looks weird but interesting.









there is another 2 more neoprint but can;t seem to upload it so will do it another day!! hehe like this neoprint best coz everyone face was rather clear except zhiqiang and i din look so fat in it haha but look so dark!!!! ARG!!!!!!

Busy day!!!

Today had tennis lesson as usual but during the first half hour i could not concentrate at all. Mood swing bah!! was feeling upset somehow. Anyway i pick myself up and concentrated in the game and i was back to normal. Being able to hit the balls and getting my swing the rite way. Well usual i got darker again haha!!!

Well after that took a shower in sch and had lunch all in 45 mins and had to rush to meet the CSC ppl to get ready to go do volunteer work at the bright hill evergreen home. well basically we went there to interact wif the old folks there but i had communication problem coz cannot speak any dialect at all. Haiz... anyway i juz asked my parents to teach moi to speak canto and hokkien so that when i go attachment in week 15 i can at least interact or else very troublesome to everytime call someone to help me translate. Well after soe interaction, we had to push the folk to the performing area coz the harmonica grp were performing. Well the highlite of the day to me was when Hong Wei, one of the yr 2 volunteer started to sing for the folks. His voice not bad and was so cute when he tried to get the folk to participate in the singing too. Well but at least the folks like it so it was heartening to see them enjoying the performances. well after that it back to interactions.

I guess i haf to work in interpersonal skills coz i always dunno wat to say to strangers sometimes even to ppl i know. No topics in my brains haha. Guess coz i've been keeping things all to myself that i dun like to really tok to other ppl. Oh Suddenly remb. 2 yrs ago when working in the learning centre i was like always quiet and doing my work. suddenly i had a comment on some topic my collegue, the kids were tokking so i juz rattle on and on till my colleuge got a shock coz when i tok i really could juz go on. anyway at that moment it was funny lah.

Haiz. miss those times. Actually miss those times in secondary sch. Haha i guess coz i was in control of myself and i had alot of activites to participate coz of student council. so much fun!! Now like dun haf that kind of fun anymore coz ppl around me are so 'funny ' in a scarastic way haha!! You guys should see how one gal in my klass juz to be part of that stupid grp than she act like a maid doing stuff for them. Dunno whether to pity or laugh at her. How can she ever let them do this to her leh. Sometime juz dunno wat goes through her pea brains. If she ever consider them as frens than i wonder wat are frens really for? How do ppl really define frens now adays? Knowing alot of ppl means they are ur frens? wat is exactly the true meaning of the word 'FRIEND' *ponders*


Well something for u to ponder on and tell moi okay!!!

Lazy ppl updates ur blogs leh!!!!

Scare of my life

Today was the first lesson of my new module HS1029 tutorial and the lecturer gave me a scare that my heart sunk. She made us re grp our sub grps in a stupid way that only fate is the one going to choose ur grp members. We were ask to stand in a line according to our birthday and after that we had to go 1, 2, 3, 4,1 ,2 3, 4. So all the 1s were together 2s together and so on. wat a stupid way!! After seeing my new grp members than i was relieved. Lucky i was not together with that stupid germaine and with some other ppl who are not really very cooperative in grp disscussions.


WAT A RELIEF!!!!!!

So my grp consist of Estelle, Su Duan, Qiao Qiao, Nazri and Evelyn. At least my frens are in the same grp as moi ( estelle, su duan and qiao qiao). As for evelyn i work wif her be4 in the same grp but i was not very please with her coz she follows the crowd too much and like dun haf a mind of her own and worst of all...... that time i had to do her part of the project as well. haiz hope history dun repeat itself again. As for Naz, never really tok to him b4 coz he is the quiet one but heard from estelle that he also another problematic one, come for disscussions but dun do work. his mind like always elsewhere. Dunno wat is going on in his brains!!! Well this time round i'm the leader so i hope i can push them to do their part and score well for this module though at this moment i still dun haf any idea wat the lecturer is tokking about in klass haha!!!

New Song

Like the new background song? Its one of the sub theme song from this show call 'Baseball dream' well its a taiwanese idol show but its nice to watch.Funny yet touching. Ohya this song it titled,'Ni Ke Yi Ai Wo Heng Niu Ma' I like cry so many times over a few scenes haha but my highest record for crying over a show so many times would be burning flame 1 ( hk drama bout firemen) so sad this show.

Well these days in sch not too bad lah but rather stress coz so many new things to study and i would be studying medicine too which is like OMG!!! so many different kind of drugs to remember and i somemore got STM haiz how to remember!!! haiz juz haf to try my best liao.

Oh bout 3 more weeks to my driving test liao haiz!!! hope can pass this time round or else i will be so piss off with myself!!! how come i can fail a practical so many time. Never failed more than twice b4. Hope this time can pass coz i will be skipping lectures. Which means passing the test makes it worth while skipping all those important lectures with my absentee rate going down....... hope is not more than 7% or else going to recieve warning letter again haha!!!

Gonna slp liao tomolo lecture at 9am. SO EARLY!!!!! take care dudes!!!! sound so cheena!!! haha

A New Term..

Today is the first day of the new term and i wanted to resolve the dumb conflict between that stupid gal and moi so i tried to be nice and juz like greet her hi BUT............ BUT she just gave me that wat the heck look and juz stared at me as if i got problem like that. WAT THE F***. It was just too naive of me to think that she would at least say hi or watever but boy was i wrong. She is really a crapping gal who thinks too highly of herself and she is always rite. Our problem was like over a month ago before the holiday started and she still so PETTY!!! juz becoz i din wanna take home a charity booklet from the lecturer to sell it or buy a ticket from her. I have my reasons why i din wanna take the booklet home. Its like no point in giving it to me coz my social of frens are like so small, it was exam period, i only shuttle from sch and home everyday who am i going to sell to. going to the neighbours is illegal so who to sell to. So wat is the point of taking one home is i cannot sell any which makes no sense coz selling the tickets are to raise money to help the charity organization. Sometime i really wonder wat goes inside her pea brain. Its like really fustrating coz i already 'di sheng xia qi' to break the ice but that gal is juz too petty over a matter like that. Somemore i dun 'di sheng xia qi' to ppl one coz i never regret certain actions i do esp when it comes to standing up for myself and believing in myself that i'm doing the rite things. She bad mouth me infront of the stupid lecturer i already dun care why can't she just be more understanding and open-minded. Thats why i really hate gals. Gals are like so petty, their empty vessels that makes alot of noise, most are BIMBOS, why can't they be more upfront and deal problems face to face and solve it instead of i hate you and u hate me like kindergarden sch kids. haiz........... i wonder.

Well I swear that i'm not going to bother bout her anymore in my life even if she going to die. well mayb juz save her even if she going to die and just leave her aside bah. watever happens to her is none of my business and wun let ppl like her affect me coz not worth it. I've already made the move but since she is so 'small hearted' than is none of my business, at least i've tried. If she ever haf problems, let all of her pretencious frens help her. I dun wanna be pretencious infront of anyone anymore coz i wanna be who i am. the one who can protect myself from all kinds of harm. Even if ppl all stay away from me just becoz i offended their silly fren, coz they believe in the rumours that gal start than i'll juz accept it coz at least i'm happy and i still haf my china frens and sui chan and of course ZQ, Bengi and Shermeen who accept me for who i am even they all know i got a weird temper though i haf already mild it down alot that is almost to none already haha. wat bullshit!! i think its time to erupt it to certain ppl already. Haiz also dunno if can do that coz i now haf this thing in me that i cannot hurt other ppl or else i will feel bad bout it even if that person deserve it. haiz so 'fan'

Wat a feeling to start a new term. I see so many 17 yrs old kids but why only my klass ppl are so 'different' that i cannot get along with them at all. but i have no problem with the rest!!!!!!!! can someone tell me why???? i really wanna know why??? and why all the acting????? Dun they feel tired ????? or do i haf a problem?????

bored.......

Aiyo I'm so bored so decided to come type another entry.Wow first time i writing 2 entries in one day. u guys muz be thinking i today got so much things to crap arh hahahaha!!! Bored lah nothin to do so like that lor...

let me see........... wat to type arh............ thinking hard............ wat should i say........... haiz i gif up. nothin much to say haha.


Ohya!!! just now went through the list of songs of Yang Cheng Lin new album and found one song has the same title as one of the song i wrote few months back. wow so 'qiao'.


This is Yang cheng Lin version:


爱情的颜色
当指尖轻轻滑过你眉梢 我幻想能靠在你的怀抱
多希望一直陪在你身旁 就怕听不到你的心跳

这一秒突然之间想知道 我在你心里究竟多重要

爱情的颜色 怎么我努力你却看不见呢

眼睛湿湿的没说出的爱只为了不让你负荷 负荷

这一刻突然之间才知道 你在我心里究竟多重要

爱情的颜色 怎么我努力你却看不见呢 只要你快乐
我付出一切只为了不让你负荷
我为你负荷



This is my version:


爱情的颜色

黑暗中的我 独自躺在天空下
这顿分离的日子 我努力得忘记你
但你已是 我唯一色彩
认识你的那一颗
我黑白世界 有了爱情色彩
我们的爱情是否像 黑白电影一样
成为了过去 让你就这样 say goodbye
雨过后的彩虹闪不亮我灰色心情
这份伤心渲染了心灵 化为泪水
Only You, You are the one
你是天使恩赐的相遇
已如透过树影的阳光般 温暖
I give you my love
无可替代的爱
As time goes by
站在红地毯远方的我
愿能将我的爱情 刻在我心中
祝你永远的幸福
Only You, You are the one
你是天使恩赐的相遇
已如透过树影的阳光般 温暖
I give you my love
无可替代的爱
我爱你



haha my so long winded as compared to Cheng Lin's version. haha which one better arh??? mayb Cheng Lin version better bah coz my still a little no head no tail one haha. mayb of got chance than go learn how to write songs than next time if wanna switch job can go become song writer and win awards haha i muz be dreaming!!!

finally got my stuff......

Yesterday went on a shopping trip with ZQ and TSL but in the end din manage to get anything. So sad. So today i went to another place at toa payoh to check out the clothes there. hehe lucky today manage to get some clothes for the new sem or else haf to wear wat i wore last sem. This shop sells about the same kind of clothes as the one at far east. This shop their service much better and the clothes they take in also much nicer bah coz its suitable for ppl my age as compared to far east. hehe another shop i can go shop shop again but a bit far only. NOw adays hard to find clothes my size. they either too small or too big. I like in between of no where. sad case lah. skinny also cannot, fat also cannot. wat to do!!!!! clothes nowadays are like only for the super skinny or super fat ppl.Than ppl like me how!!!! haha. i tink i next sem everyday go jogging bah be4 sch than no need to fan such things liao and somewhere can save money. hahahaha!!! but i only like tennis haha. anyone game!!! i got extra racket to lend!!! esp zq and tsl. same sch so can play wif moi. tennis very fun leh but only problem is that you would be tan. haha like moi. now got 4 colours. 2 diff colours on the arm and legs.

Enough of psycho-ing liao haha. wanna go slack liao byezzz and gd luck in ur job hunting!! (zq)

Earth......

Been so surrounded with attachment that only recently i started to read the newspaper. Although i know that there has been many sad things going on. Only these few days when reading the newspaper than i realize that the death poll and so high and many living areas has been destroy. Rather sad to see all those pictures and esp.pictures where ppl are suffering, crying over the lost of their loves ones etc...

This only shows how lucky we singaporeans are but yet here we are always whinning. coming up with some scheming plans to back stab others. If only everyone including those terrorists spare a thought for others, stop all those killing and greediness to wanna control the world thingie and not only be an empty vessel that makes alot of noise than mayb the world would be a better place. I guess mother nature is mutating now as a form of punishment to us bah.

The land is changing form, the climate is changing too, everything on earth is changing.From nature to human beings. Its the world coming to and end already. This reminds me when i was in primary sch, there was some art competition on how the world would be like in 2050. Everyone was like drawing robots, ppl flying and watever but i was the only one who drew the world coming to an end where it juz scrumble to pieces. HAHA so young than think of such a sad picture of the future.

However it seems that its becoming that way. Wonder how the future may behold for everyone of us here.......

Confused......

This two days feeling a little confuse already. Can't seem to 'tidy up my feelings' on a certain matter. Hate this kind of feeling. It has been long since i felt this way again. The last time it happened was in sec 5 bah.

Beside this, there is another problem but i cannot tell anyone at all. No one i can talk too but only to keep it within myself.Feeling a little sad. This problem is like a year ago but ppl are now still habouring over it and its really vexing. Really need to tok to someone but haf to keep mums.Can't even tell my parents how i feel coz will only worry them.They always think i can handle the matter but honestly i can't anymore. Its so difficult when i'm no longer in control of my feelings anymore and haf to pretend that nothing happen at all.

Feeling really tired emotionally and i really hope this feeling can just go away. Really far away coz no one would ever ever......

Last day of attachment and beginning of freedom....

YEAH!!!!!!!!! last day of polyclinic attachment. SO HAPPY but sadly today was boring. Last day already but had a boring day.It's over anyway.ONE WHOLE WEEK OF SLEEPING IN . YEAH!!!!!! no more early mornings.

Well this whole week of attachment was not only boring but interesting to a certain extend. First of all. me and my frens are always being stared at as if we are museum displays like that. NEVER see nursing students be4 meh??? the second funniest thingie is that every patient that see me would open their mouth and start to speak in malay. WAH!!! do i really look like a malay meh. Today got even one patient who was speaking in dialect to the nurse and then turn to me and said in english,'you understand wat i tokking about meh?' and i had to like yah. i chinese. I think i say this like dunno how many times liao till i so xian. All this started by ZQ when in sec 1 she thought i was malay and since then most ppl i met all think i malay. ALL UR FAULT ZQ!!!! (juz kidding lah).

Anyway attachment has come to an end and soon sch only to start soon and its the start of my misery again. haiz not in sch work (i so intelligent where got problem. haha like real!!!) but as in my klass mates. haiz got to see those childish and pretencious ppl again for another sem. sad case. hope this time round they dun come and disturb me coz i think i surely gif them or rather her a piece of my mind liao. NO more mr nice guy.

okay no more crappying again. Well today must really thanx ZQ and TSL for going out for dinner wif moi. thanx guys. next time must haf more of such thingie and bengi muz come too. And sorrie for leaving early arh coz i wanna go cut my hair. lucky i went early leh coz they close at 9pm. hehe. and ZQ the sending the postage to ur place no nned liao coz i found one shop that they can change the clip on for moi. thanx.

one more thingie i wanna say be4 signing off to slp. Guys pls go update ur bloggie leh. we hardly meet or tok so mus update blog so i can know how u doing in life mah. IT means YOU, YOU and YOU dun turn around its YOU!!!! so try to update once in every 2 days or so okie. Just entertain me lah coz i KPO haha!!! like that than can know if u still alive anot haha okie. should know wat i mean lah. if not than too bad haha!!! okie going to watch vcd than slp liao.

SO Long, fare well............ and the song goes on.............

TOday is the bestest( my slang vocab) day!!

Each day in the polyclinic seems to be better but the best is that tomolo is the last day. My poor legs need the rest already. Thank god i already had good training from my hospital attachment or else i sure die in the polyclinic.

Well today was assign to the immunization room and another room where counselling of diseases were done. Anyway i had fun in the immune room coz saw so many babies and they were sooooooooo cute. One of the babies i saw today even had the same B'dae as moi. There was another baby that was really cute. he even grab my fingers and start playing wif it. Lucky he never try to put my fingers into his mouth HAHAHA!!! anyway my hand too big for his little mouth. He was so cute and cubby. Felt like carrying him haha. Today was really gd and even better than yesterday. Can see cute little babies and somemore play wif some of them. such a warm and fuzzy feeling. (is it the correct words to use???) who cares is my blog hahaha.

Tomolo last day liao and i guess i haf to Shou Shi my feeling and thoughts already. In this 3 weeks of attachment i really see much more stuff than i think i would ever see, experiences different things and i feel that even my thinking also mature a little bit more bah. ( i hope so haha if not than nvm lah)but i guess my cow (stubborn) temper still there bah but only to certain ppl. But it makes sense coz i born in the yr of cow wat. WAHAHAHAHAHA!!! crapping nonsense again haha.

But the best of all is that i made new frens whether isit from NYP, NP or even ITE etc. Hope we can all still keep in contact esp my new frens from NP (zhiqiang, cuyan and benedict) coz they were my first new frens i made in the hospital and i enjoy their company coz they are all so interesting in their own way.

P.S Zhiquan remb not to be late tomolo arh. and thanx for agreeing to meet at 6.30pm at lot 1. coz i very rush if at 6pm and i dun eat dinner so early leh haha.thanx. cya tomolo!!!!

Another day has passed..

3 days has passed and boy am i happy thought today was more meaniful as compared tp twp days ago. Today was assign to the developmental room and the so call emergency room. Well it was kinda fun coz at least i learn alot of stuff today and there was so many babies to see. They are sooooooo cute. Today do tepid sponging on a baby and it was the best happening of today. Well done a few tepid sponging for adults but baby is first time. While doing tepid sponging for the baby than he stick his hand into the basin and started to play with water. He was like playing wif water and crying at the same time. So cute and funny. Anyway it was fun. Haha but the next two days might not be so interesting thought tomolo can still see cute little kids coz tomolo i'm assign to the immune room where kids haf to go for their injections. Wow mayb tomolo i will turn deaf from their cries.

Feeling a little sick already guess its a cold coz my nose is running like a tap water. This boils down to me being a big mouth bah. I commented to my mum that one of my klass mate only 1 week in polyclinic than fall sick already than in hospital sure die liao. My retribution. Me and my always come true as in bad things mouth. Still trying to learn how to shut my gap if going to say bad things bout ppl coz later i sure get it one. Haha!!!

Last nite could not slp so was like reading everyone's blog entries from past to present and found out one freaky thingie. Its like there is billions and billions of ppl in the world and i actually get to meet someone that shares almost which is like about 98% same fate as moi in certain things. Its like so weird. HAHA how lucky of me.

P.S to Zhiqiang if ya reading this. Next time juz leave ur name at the comment board instead of np fren. When i read it, it was so funni.Juz find it funni haha.... hey dun bother to ask xiao hui bout the allowance thingie already coz doesn;t matter already. Just like wat i said during our conversation. thanx alot..

P.S to Bengi and ZQ. hey you two decide if wanna go eat on friday nite anot than sms me can okie. Go suki sushi hor if eating out coz never try that place yet and its bout 19++ wif gst coz bengi last time say he went there b4 than pay 19++. Sakae also bout the same price. If can call shermmen out too bah and ziyan too if possible. that gal if dun see her soon i sure cannot reco her next time liao.

OKIE enough message leaving be4 i start to crap again

Tata gotta slp already just took medicine....... bye ya.... Enjoy ur holidays....

2nd day at polyclinic

Well today was much better than yesterday coz at least i can help take height and weight, bring case file to another room, do translation and stuff. BUt today i totally like in a foreign country. Today the nurses there all open their mouth and start to speak malay. MALAY!!! and 98% of the patients are also malay so i was like wat the heck are they tokking bout.So today like haf to open my golden mouth to ask or else i really like dun fit in anywhere haha.

Well todae nothing much happening lah coz still find it kinda boring. Well today find out mayb got hospital allowance to claim but dunno can anot so see how first lah coz now my np fren helping me ask my nyp fren whom i dun haf her number to ask the lecturer. Oh well hope can claim at least to cover my transport.

TATA tomolo another day at the polyclinic. 3 more days to go........

First day at Jurong Polyclinic

Well the only word to describe my day today is BORING and yes its boring!!!! this polyclinic attachment thingie is really just to open ur eyes and ears to learn and hardly and i do mean hardly nothing for one to help out at all. I this kind of person where can just stand all day to observe and do so little work. haiz four more days to and i hope i can participate more and not just stand and look all day long.

Well i guess another factor why it was boring coz everyone was being paired up but moi. so sad .poor moi. just because my name was last in the list so no one to pair up wif. But oh well at least i get to observe without worrying if my parthner can see anot or stuff and can solely haf the nurse to answer all my doubt watsoever. HAHAHA!!!! evil me. Kinda miss working in the hospital already and the ppl of course. Guess was becoz i din feel that i was being judge coz of the way i look bah but whether i was a keen and capable learner bah. Oh wat the hell. going back to looking down on myself again. Geez tokking crap again....

Nothing much bah i guess. Tomolo is another day again. ( Tian arh pls let me not to be so bored. i need to do stuff.) haha tian shen lao lu ming!!!

P.S Bengi and ZQ wanna go out for diner this friday anot? Go suki sushi can??? but if no $$$ than we go marina next week bah. cheaper!! or any other recommendations???
Bengi the naruto vcds isit you haf the whole set arh and isit in cdr or in ur com. if in cdr can lend me to bring home watchie. thanx.